Wet Pants

 

Come with me to a third grade classroom… There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet.

He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine how this has happened. It’s never happened before, and he knows that when the boys find out he will never hear the end of it. When the girls find out, they’ll never speak to him again as long as he lives.

The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down and prays this prayer, ‘Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now! Five minutes from now I’m dead meat.’

He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered. As the teacher is walking toward him, a classmate named Susie is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water. Susie trips in front of the teacher and inexplicably dumps the bowl of water in the boy’s lap.

The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself, ‘Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!’

Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy. The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out. All the other children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that should have been his has been transferred to someone else – Susie.

She tries to help, but they tell her to get out. You’ve done enough, you klutz!’

Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy walks over to Susie and whispers, ‘You did that on purpose, didn’t you?’ Susie whispers back, ‘I wet my pants once too.’

May God help us see the opportunities that are always around us to do good.

Remember, just going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.

Each and everyone one of us is going through tough times right now, but God is getting ready to bless you in a way that only He can. Keep the faith.

— Author Unknown

Meditation: In my distress I cried to the Lord, And He heard me. – Psalm 120:1

You will succeed in Jesus' Name!

U-Turns

 

“Thanks for inviting me to go to church with you next Sunday, Uncle Al.”

Tim and his uncle were on their way to Bonny Lake. They had heard the fishing there was great.

“I…I don’t want to hurt your feelings,” continued Tim, “but . . . well . . . I’m not sure I want to get into this religious stuff. Besides, Mom and Dad don’t think it’s a good idea.”

“Oh?” asked Uncle Al in surprise. “I thought you said that your parents wouldn’t mind if you went with me. You sounded quite interested last week. You even said the Gospel was beginning to make sense to you.”

“Yeah, but since then I’ve done a lot of thinking,” Tim said slowly. “I don’t think I feel like getting ‘saved’ right now. The crowd I hang around with at school wouldn’t understand, and I like being with them. Someday I’ll start going to church, but I think I’ll just go on the way I am for a while. I know I’m not perfect, but I’m not so bad, either.”

Tim’s uncle drove on silently for a few minutes. “Oh, no!” he exclaimed as they passed a road sign. “I was so intent on our conversation that I missed the turnoff! We should have gotten off this road five miles back!”

“Guess we’ll have to turn around and go back now, huh?” asked Tim.

But Uncle Al shook his head. “I don’t feel like turning around right now,” he said. “I guess we’ll just keep going this way. I kind of like this road, and the scenery is nice.”

Tim looked at his uncle in amazement. “But we have to turn around to get to Bonny Lake,” he protested, “and the longer we keep going this way, the longer it will take to get back. If we wait too long to turn around, we might not even get there in time to fish.”

Uncle Al smiled at Tim as he slowed down for the next turn. “You’re right,” he said, “and what you said just now is exactly what I’ve been trying to tell you about spiritual life . . . that when you’re travelling down the wrong road, the sooner you turn around, the better. If you wait too long, you might never get to your goal: Heaven.”

— Author Unknown

Meditation: Say to them: ‘As I live,’ says the Lord God, ‘I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but that the wicked turn from his way and live. Turn, turn from your evil ways! For why should you die, O house of Israel?’ – Ezekiel 33:11

You will succeed in Jesus' Name!

On the Other Side

 

A sick man turned to his doctor, as he was preparing to leave the examination room and said, “Doctor, I am afraid to die. Tell me what lies on the other side.”

Very quietly, the doctor said, “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know? You, a Christian man, do not know what is on the other side?”

The doctor was holding the handle of the door; on the other side of which came a sound of scratching and whining, and as he opened the door, a dog sprang into the room and leapt on him with an eager show of gladness.

Turning to the patient, the doctor said, “Did you notice my dog? He’s never been in this room before. He didn’t know what was inside. He knew nothing except that his master was here, and when the door opened, he sprang in without fear.

I know little of what is on the other side of death, but I do know one thing…I know my Master is there and that is enough.”

— Author Unknown

Meditation: “Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.” – John 14:1-2

You will succeed in Jesus' Name!

Letter from God

From: GOD

To: All those who believe in me

Date: Today and Everyday

Subject: Life’s problems

I am God. Today I will be handling all of your problems. Please remember that I do not need your help. If the devil happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do not attempt to resolve it. Kindly put it in the SFJTD (something for Jesus to do) box. It will be addressed in MY TIME, not yours. Once the matter is placed into the box, do not hold on to it or remove it.

Holding on or removal will delay the resolution of your problem. If it is a situation that you think you are capable of handling, please consult me in prayer to be sure that it is the proper resolution.

Because I do not sleep nor do I slumber, there is no need for you to lose any sleep. Rest my child. If you need to contact me, I am only a prayer away.

As with all good things, please pass it on.

— Author Unknown

Meditation: casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. – 1 Peter 5:7

You will succeed in Jesus' Name!

I Found Jesus There

 

The surgeon sat beside the boy’s bed; the boy’s parents sat across from him. “Tomorrow morning,” the surgeon began, “I’ll open up your heart…”

“You’ll find Jesus there,” the boy interrupted.

The surgeon looked up, annoyed. “I’ll cut your heart open,” he continued, “to see how much damage has been done…”

“But when you open up my heart, you’ll find Jesus in there.” The surgeon looked to the parents, who sat quietly.

“When I see how much damage has been done, I’ll sew your heart and chest back up and I’ll plan what to do next.”

“But you’ll find Jesus in my heart. The Bible says He lives there. The hymns all say He lives there. You’ll find Him in my heart.”

The surgeon had had enough. “I’ll tell you what I’ll find in your heart. I’ll find damaged muscle, low blood supply, and weakened vessels. And I’ll find out if I can make you well.”

“You’ll find Jesus there too. He lives there.”

The surgeon left. The surgeon sat in his office, recording his notes from the surgery: “…damaged aorta, damaged pulmonary vein, widespread muscle degeneration. No hope for transplant, no hope for cure. Therapy: painkillers and bed rest. Prognosis:” here he paused, “death within one year.”

He stopped the recorder, but there was more to be said. “Why?” he asked aloud. “Why did You do this? You’ve put him here; You’ve put him in this pain, and You’ve cursed him to an early death. Why?”

The Lord answered and said, “The boy, My lamb, was not meant for your flock for long, for he is a part of My flock, and will forever be. Here, in My flock, he will feel no pain and will be comforted as you cannot imagine. His parents will one day join him here, and they will know peace, and My flock will continue to grow.”

The surgeon’s tears were hot, but his anger was hotter. “You created that boy, and You created that heart. He’ll be dead in months. Why?”

The Lord answered, “The boy, My lamb, shall return to My flock, for he has done his duty: I did not put My lamb with your flock to lose him, but to retrieve another lost lamb.”

The surgeon wept.

The surgeon sat beside the boy’s bed; the boy’s parents sat across from him. The boy awoke and whispered, “Did you cut open my heart?”

“Yes,” said the surgeon.

“What did you find?” asked the boy.

“I found Jesus there,” said the surgeon.

— Author Unknown

Meditation: For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. – Romans 5:10

You will succeed in Jesus' Name!

One Guy Didn’t

 

Three guys were tried for crimes against humanity.

Two guys committed crimes.

One guy didn’t.

Three guys were given government trials.

Two guys had fair trials.

One guy didn’t.

Three guys were whipped and beaten.

Two guys had it coming.

One guy didn’t.

Three guys were given crosses to carry.

Two guys earned their crosses.

One guy didn’t.

Three guys were mocked and spit at along the way.

Two guys cursed and spit back.

One guy didn’t.

Three guys were nailed to crosses.

Two guys deserved it.

One guy didn’t.

Three guys agonized over their abandonment.

Two guys had reason to be abandoned.

One guy didn’t.

Three guys talked while hanging on their crosses.

Two guys argued.

One guy didn’t.

Three guys knew death was coming.

Two guys resisted.

One guy didn’t.

One.

Two.

Three guys died on three crosses.

Three days later.

Two guys remained in their graves.

One guy didn’t.

— Author Unknown

Meditation: For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. – Romans 8:29

You will succeed in Jesus' Name!

A Date with the Other Woman

 After 21 years of marriage, I discovered a new way of keeping alive the spark of love. A little while ago, I started to go out with another woman. It was really my wife’s idea.

“I know you love her,” she said one day, taking me by surprise.

“But I love YOU!” I protested.

“I know, but you also love her.”

The other woman my wife wanted me to visit was my mother, who has been a widow for 19 years. The demands of my work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally. That night, I called to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie.

“What’s wrong, are you well,” she asked? My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news.

“I thought it would be pleasant to pass some time with you,” I responded. “Just the two of us.”

She thought about it for a moment, and then said, “I would like that very much.”

That Friday, after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous. When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our date. She waited in the doorway with her coat on. She had curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel’s.

“I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed,” she said, as she got into the car. “They can’t wait to hear about our meeting.”

We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. My mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady.

After we sat down, I had to read the menu. Her eyes could only read large print. Halfway through the entree, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips.

“It was I who used to have to read the menu when you were small,” she said.

“Then it’s time you relaxed and let me return the favour,” I responded.

During the dinner, we had an agreeable conversation – nothing extraordinary – just catching up on recent events of each other’s lives. We talked so much that we missed the movie.

As we arrived at her house later, she said, “I’ll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you.” I agreed and kissed her good night.

“How was your dinner date?” asked my wife when I got home.

“Very nice. Much nicer than I could have imagined,” I answered.

A few days later, my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn’t have a chance to do anything for her.

Sometime later, I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place mother and I had dined. An attached note said: “I paid this bill in advance. I was almost sure that I couldn’t be there, but, never-the-less, I paid for two plates –one for you and the other for your wife. You will never know what that night meant to me. I love you.”

At that moment, I understood the importance of saying, “I LOVE YOU” in time, and to give our loved ones the time that they deserve. Nothing in life is more important than God and your family. Give them the time they deserve, because these things cannot always be put off to “some other time.”

–– Author Unknown

Meditation: There is one alone, without companion: He has neither son nor brother. Yet there is no end to all his labors, nor is his eye satisfied with riches. But he never asks, “For whom do I toil and deprive myself of good?” This also is vanity and a grave misfortune. – Ecclesiastes 4:8

You will succeed in Jesus' Name!